ShadowNet
by xxCalixx
Summary: Shadowhunters and Downworlders are all discovering the newest social media website: Shadownet. How will Jace and Alec deal with fandoms, fanfiction, and OTPs? Magnus and Isabelle with Throwback Thursdays, Man Crush Mondays, hashtags, and Transformation Tuesdays? And... Simon as Edward Cullen? All our favorite ships: Clace, Malec, and Sizzy. No swear words. Loose T rating.
1. one

**Title: **ShadowNet Chapter One  
**Warnings: **One inexplicit, non-descriptive reference to sex. No swear words.  
**Category: **Romance/Humor  
If you don't know a term I use in this chapter (for example: canon, ship, otp, Troyler), definitions will be down below.  
There is a THG reference in here.  
If you're here because you've read my other fic (if you're not, ignore this), know that this will not be the same kind of literature. Completely different level. Those usually take me 45 minutes to an hour, and this took me around 15-20. This is a lot more relaxed and easier for me to write in general. That being said, I'm sorry for not updating that fic. I'm basically stuck and using this as a way to try to get over writer's block. Plus, this is fun to write.

* * *

"Simon…" Isabelle prodded his shoulder to get his attention. "Simon!"

He looked up, adjusting his crooked glasses. "What?"

"What are you doing?"

"I'm updating my ShadowNet status. Why?"

Isabelle crinkled her nose. "What's ShadowNet?"

"It's that new social networking site that some Shadowhunter set up. All the Shadowhunters and Downworlders have one. See, this button here…"

Two Weeks Later:**  
**By this time, Isabelle had made a account for herself, Alec, and Jace, and they were all addicted. Gradually, almost everyone in the Shadowhunter and Downworlder world had a account.

~~o~~O~~o~~

Isabelle flopped down on her bed and turned on her laptop to log on to ShadowNet. Clary had posted a picture of her and Jace lying down in bed.

* * *

**Clarissa Fray (clarebear):  
**i'm sick :( #quick #sendsoupandhugs #andcoffeebecausejacewontletmedrinkitwhileimsick #butmostlyhugs

* * *

SimonTheVamp: *hugs*  
_clarebear liked this_

goldenboy: hey! back off

SimonTheVamp: well i don't see you giving her any hugs

goldenboy: *hugs*

clarebear: jace, you're sitting 3 feet away from me right now

goldenboy: and?

clarebear: get over here

sizzyizzy: seriously jace?  
_SimonTheVamp liked this_

sizzyizzy: oh and get well soon clary

WarlockBane: *hugs*

WarlockBane: hello?

WarlockBane: clary?

WarlockBane: are you ignoring my magnificence?

sizzyizzy: they're probably making out. big, messy make-outage  
_WarlockBane and 2 others liked this_

SimonTheVamp: ew i don't need that mental image izzy

sizzyizzy: want me to give you another mental image? ;)

ilovemagnus: ISABELLE

clarebear: we weren't making out! i dropped my phone

SimonTheVamp: what's with your username alec?  
_WarlockBane, goldenboy, and 1 other liked this_

WarlockBane: teehee

ilovemagnus: someone please tell me how to change it

goldenboy: no way  
_clarebear, sizzyizzy, and 4 others liked this_

* * *

**Magnus Bane (WarlockBane):  
**waking alec up this morning ;) ilovemagnus

**Video Started~**

_*rustling and shaky camera work*_

Magnus- _*bouncing on bed*_ Alec. _*bounce*_ Alec. _*bounce*_ Alec. _*bounce*_

Alec-_ *muffled*_ mmf _*pulls blanket over head*_

Magnus- _*pulls blanket off*_

Alec- _*puts pillow over head*_

Magnus- ALEXANDER

Alec- _*grunts*_

Magnus- Don't make sex noises at the camera, Alec.

Alec- Magnus! _*throws pillow at camera* *pulls blanket over head again*_

Magnus- _*pulls blanket off again*_ Hey, Alec?

Alec- _*rubs eyes* *looks up sleepily*_ What?

Magnus- I love you.

Alec- Love you too, Magnus. *yawns* Now shut up. _*throws another pillow at camera*_

_*rustling* *camera is picked back up*_

Magnus- _*blows kiss at camera* *waves goodbye*_

**Video Ended~**

* * *

sizzyizzy: awww that was cute  
_WarlockBane, glitter_malec, and 1 other liked this_

clarebear: who's glitter_malec?

WarlockBane: me :D

sizzyizzy: i have a malec fan acc too!

MalecIsMyOtp: heyy  
_WarlockBane liked this_

goldenboy: uhh

MalecIsMyOtp: wait WarlockBane why do you have a fan account on a ship you're in? self centered much?

ilovemagnus: glitter_malec MalecIsMyOtp WHAT?

WarlockBane: oh calm down. it's not like i write smutty fanfics about us

ilovemagnus: WHAT

ClaceIsMyOtp: i have a clace account too  
_sizzyizzy liked this_

goldenboy: i am so confused  
_ilovemagnus and 1 other liked this_

PetrisIsMyOtp: and a petris one  
_sizzyizzy liked this  
clarebear disliked this_

clarebear: whAT YOU CAN'T SHIP PETRIS IT'S NOT EVEN CANON

sizzyizzy: but they have so much chemistry!1!1!1!11!

clarebear: NO THEY'RE MY NOTP

sizzyizzy: oh calm down i'm joking #fourtrisforlife

goldenboy: i am still so confused. ship? cannon? are we talking about pirates?

ilovemagnus: ^^

WarlockBane: HAHAHA

sizzyizzy: AHAHAHAHAHA

clarebear: oh jace

goldenboy: ?  
_ilovemagnus liked this_

PhanAndTroyler: *laughs maniacally* WELCOME TO THE PHANDOM

sizzyizzy: PhanAndTroyler who are you?

PhanAndTroyler: you may never know *mysterious ghost noises* *slowly retreats* *fades into the shadows*

clarebear: okay...

goldenboy: WHAT IS GOING ON? I'M SO DONE WITH THIS

goldenboy: i'm leaving

ilovemagnus: same

_SimonTheVamp logged on_

SimonTheVamp: hi...so what'd i miss?

WarlockBane: oh sherlock

clarebear: oh simon

sizzyizzy: oh simon

SimonTheVamp: WarlockBane for the 400th time, it's simon! and huh?

SimonTheVamp: are you guys ignoring me now?

SimonTheVamp: having a secret powwow?

SimonTheVamp: fine be that way

PhanAndTroyler: hi ;)

SimonTheVamp: who are you?

PhanAndTroyler: you wanna read the hummus fic with me? or the skin fic?

SimonTheVamp: NO GOODBYE CREEP

PhanAndTroyler: dubai!

* * *

**Isabelle Lightwood (sizzyizzy):  
**triple date tonight at taki's with the bæs :* SimonTheVamp clarebear ilovemagnus goldenboy WarlockBane

* * *

MaureenTheQueen: SimonTheVamp i thought we had something special :'(  
_sizzyizzy disliked this_

KaeTheFae: goldenboy we're over! i can't believe u cheated on me

SimonTheVamp: MaureenTheQueen WE NEVER DATED  
_sizzyizzy liked this_

goldenboy: KaeTheFae we're not dating...  
_clarebear and 1 other liked this_

KaeTheFae: ya obvi because i just broke up with you

goldenboy: i know i'm hot and all but WE WEREN'T DATING TO BEGIN WITH

KaeTheFae: wutever i have meliorn

sizzyizzy: KaeTheFae i broke up with him. too clingy

MaureenTheQueen: SimonTheVamp i forgive you bby. i'll take you back 3

SimonTheVamp: we're still not dating  
_sizzyizzy liked this_

clarebear: KaeTheFae MaureenTheQueen what's with the rhymey names?

~~o~~O~~o~~

Isabelle scrolled down more to find that Jace had posted a picture of himself when he was younger, holding a seraph blade, and a more recent one, holding a dagger.

* * *

**Jace Herondale (goldenboy):  
**transformation tuesday! when i was six years old to now #tt

* * *

sizzyizzy: …you sort of look the same. but younger in the first

clarebear: aww! you were a really cute kid :3  
_goldenboy liked this_

goldenboy: as opposed to now?

goldenboy: wait 'were'? i'm still cute!

sizzyizzy: *squints at your slightly deformed face onscreen* nah i don't see it  
_SimonTheVamp, WarlockBane, and 2 others liked this_

goldenboy: i am adorable! tell her clary

clarebear: ehh not really

goldenboy: hey! you're supposed to be on my side

* * *

**Magnus Bane (WarlockBane):  
**let's say, hypothetically, i dump a bucket of glitter on simon and say 'i declare thee edward cullen' and run away, would anyone be willing to film that for me? hypothetically.

* * *

goldenboy: i volunteer

clarebear: *raises hand*

sizzyizzy: i volunteer as tribute!  
_clarebear and WarlockBane liked this_

goldenboy: ?

sizzyizzy: seriously? clarebear haven't you forced him to read the hunger games yet?

clarebear: no he keeps making excuses

ilovemagnus: just tell him that it involves a lot of killing and bloodshed

sizzyizzy: actually… that'll probably work

SimonTheVamp: hey! i'm slightly offended

SimonTheVamp: actually, scratch that. i'm very offended

sizzyizzy: sorry but it was tempting

WarlockBane: i said hypothetically

SimonTheVamp: sure…

* * *

**A/N: **Hopefully, you liked that. Not great literature but maybe you found this funny? Should I continue? And if I do, do you mind that I don't use proper punctuation and capitalization (trying to make it look like actual social media) or would you rather me use it? Any requests (truth or dare, flashback friday, throwback thursday...)?  
Until next time, Cali.

* * *

I'd like to point out that these words below are all fandom terms. You'll most likely know most of them if you're reading fanfic in the first place, as I will assume you're a fangirl/fanboy. Also, you should know what Clace, Malec, and Sizzy are already. If not, I am internally tsking at you.  
Note that I haven't actually read the hummus or skin fic, and I don't want to either (see below for why).

**Ship: **When you think two people should be in a relation_ship_, can be friendship or sexual.  
**OTP: **One true pairing/favorite ship  
**Smut: **Basically fanfics where people are involved in sexual acts.  
**Canon:** Real  
**Troyler: **Ship between Troye Sivan and Tyler Oakley  
**Phan:** Ship between Dan Howell and Phil Lester  
**Phandom:** Fandom + Phan (see above)  
**Dubai:** How Tyler Oakley says bye (Du_bai_)  
**Fourtris:** Ship between Four and Tris  
**Petris:** Ship between Peter and Tris  
**NOtp:** Least favorite ship  
**The Hummus Fic: **Infamous fic from the Troyler (see above) fandom. Supposedly smutty and disturbing.  
**The Skin Fic: **Infamous fic from the Phandom (see above). Also supposedly smutty and disturbing.


	2. two

**Title:** ShadowNet Chapter Two  
**Warnings:** One vague, inexplicit reference to sex. No swear words.  
**Category:** Humor/Romance  
I snuck a The Fault In Our Stars reference into here.  
As before, references to people and/or terms will be explained down below, on the off chance that you haven't heard of them before.

* * *

**Magnus Bane (WarlockBane):**  
happy one year anniversary! ilovemagnus love you, baby! :*

* * *

clarebear: happy anniversary guys!

ilovemagnus: love you too, magnus  
_WarlockBane, sizzyizzy, and 4 others liked this_

ilovemagnus: and what did i say about calling me 'baby'?

WarlockBane: *pouts* why not? it's cute

ilovemagnus: you also said that whilst chasing me around your apartment, attempting to magick blue glittery stripes into my hair

WarlockBane: but that's because you'd look gorgeous with blue stripes

ilovemagnus: no

WarlockBane: but it brings out your eyes

ilovemagnus: still not happening

sizzyizzy: ^^ you guys are adorable :)

* * *

**Isabelle Lightwood (sizzyizzy):**  
man crush monday! *swoons* robert sheehan~ #MCM

* * *

WarlockBane: i can just feel sheldon sulking in the corner right now

SimonTheVamp: it's SIMON. and i'm not. i'm just a bit insulted

sizzyizzy: but he's gorgeous

WarlockBane: *sighs* *fans self* he is

goldenboy: SimonTheVamp ilovemagnus HA your significant others are both pining over celebrities. i bet clary's going to pick me

* * *

**Clarissa Fray (clarebear):**  
#mcm jamie campbell bower! :*

* * *

sizzyizzy: what were you saying, jace?

goldenboy: *sulks*

WarlockBane: okay now HE'S HOT

clarebear: i know!

sizzyizzy: I'D LIKE TO GET ME SOME OF THAT

SimonTheVamp: hello? still here

goldenboy: ^^

ilovemagnus: ^^

WarlockBane: don't interrupt our fangirling

sizzyizzy: and besides, you have to admit that you'd totally do him. it doesn't matter if you're straight or not

ilovemagnus: *slowly backs out of this conversation*

goldenboy: *slowly goes back to sulking in corner*

SimonTheVamp: *slowly backs out of conversation into aforementioned corner to sulk*

ilovemagnus: nicely phrased

goldenboy: *yells at ratboy to get out of my corner and find his own sulking corner*

SimonTheVamp: *pouts and finds another dark corner to lurk in*

WarlockBane: are they done yet?

WarlockBane: okay i think they left

clarebear: our boyfriends are weird

sizzyizzy: nicely phrased

* * *

**Alexander Lightwood (AlecL):**  
i found out how to change my name back :)

* * *

WarlockBane: :-/ i liked your name

sizzyizzy: that is such an uncreative username

sizzyizzy: wait who taught you how to change it back?

AlecL: i asked clary

sizzyizzy: clary!

WarlockBane: ^^yeah why would you do that?

clarebear: sorry…

* * *

**Isabelle Lightwood (sizzyizzy):**  
truth or dare! comment '∞' if you're playing

* * *

clarebear: ∞

WarlockBane: ∞

SimonTheVamp: ∞

goldenboy: ∞

sizzyizzy: alec?

AlecL: not playing. you're all going to make me do something embarrassing

WarlockBane: nope sorry you're playing

WarlockBane: ∞ for alec  
_sizzyizzy liked this_

AlecL: :-/

sizzyizzy: yay! i'll go first

* * *

**Isabelle Lightwood (sizzyizzy):**  
okay clarebear truth or dare?

* * *

clarebear: truth

sizzyizzy: how many people have you kissed? (and rate them)

clarebear: three

goldenboy: wait what?

WarlockBane: aww is someone jealous?

goldenboy: i am not!

sizzyizzy: stop changing the subject guys! clary, you have to tell us who they were and rate them

clarebear: jace (10) and simon (5)  
_goldenboy liked this_

sizzyizzy: that's 2…?

clarebear: …sebastian (0)

clarebear: in my defense, this was after jace yelled at me and before we knew that he was my brother (and before the whole half-demon wants to take over the world thing)

sizzyizzy: okay… fair enough

SimonTheVamp: hey! why am i only a 5?

clarebear: sorry but it was like kissing my brother

clarebear: wait wait no i take that back  
_sizzyizzy, goldenboy, and 6 others liked this_

clarebear: bad choice of words

sizzyizzy: lol!

WarlockBane: the irony

* * *

**Clarissa Fray (clarebear):**  
AlecL truth or dare?

* * *

AlecL: dare

clarebear: tell us magnus's embarrassing nicknames for you

sizzyizzy: ooh i actually want to know this one

AlecL: isn't that technically a truth?

sizzyizzy: yeah but answer it alec! i want to know

AlecL: he calls me alexander sometimes

goldenboy: …that's not a nickname alec. that's your actual name  
_clarebear liked this_

AlecL: fine. he calls me darling or baby, even though i tell him not to. sometimes lieveling  
_sizzyizzy and WarlockBane liked this_

SimonTheVamp: what's 'lieveling' mean?

WarlockBane: it's 'darling' in dutch

WarlockBane: isn't that right allie-bear?  
_sizzyizzy, goldenboy, and 2 others liked this_

sizzyizzy: ALLIE BEAR? HAHAHAHAH

AlecL: magnus! i told you not to call me that

WarlockBane: this is only the 2nd time i've called you that

WarlockBane: actually i think the reason i stopped calling you that is because you almost threw a wine glass at me…

clarebear: anyways, it's your turn alec

* * *

**Alexander Lightwood (AlecL):**  
goldenboy truth or dare?

* * *

goldenboy: dare

AlecL: someone help me come up with a good dare

sizzyizzy: let clary slip an ice cube down your pants. you are at her house right?

clarebear: he is. i'm going to go get an ice cube

clarebear: okay we're going to do it right now

SimonTheVamp: are you guys done?

SimonTheVamp: …

clarebear: we're done!

sizzyizzy: how'd it go?

goldenboy: fine, obviously. i can't be defeated by a measly ice cube

clarebear: he's lying. he was shrieking and doing a little dance, trying to get it out

clarebear: my mom came in, got this look on her face, and walked right back out  
_SimonTheVamp, sizzyizzy, and 3 others liked this_

SimonTheVamp: lol!

sizzyizzy: wish i could have seen that

* * *

**Jace Herondale (goldenboy):**  
truth or dare? SimonTheVamp

* * *

SimonTheVamp: truth

goldenboy: wimp

SimonTheVamp: no, i just know that you're going to give me an evil dare, so i'm not picking it

goldenboy: like i said, wimp

clarebear: jace… what did i say about being nice to simon?

goldenboy: fine clary…

sizzyizzy: it's like a mother with her little toddler

SimonTheVamp: *cough* whipped *cough*  
_goldenboy disliked this_

goldenboy: *cough* wimp *cough*  
_SimonTheVamp disliked this_

clarebear: guys!

goldenboy: okay, okay. if all 6 of us were in a burning building and you could only save 4 of us, who would you pick?

SimonTheVamp: izzy, myself, clary…  
_clarebear and sizzyizzy liked this_

SimonTheVamp: and alec

sizzyizzy: why?

SimonTheVamp: because jace is a jerk and at least alec remembers my name

AlecL: thanks. i think…

WarlockBane: i do know your name, shirley

SimonTheVamp: point proven

* * *

**A/N: **Review? Virtual hugs to you if you do.  
Also, school has started, I have an insane amount of homework, and I haven't slept in 43 hours because I was preparing for a theory exam last night. You can probably expect updates to be sporadic.  
(Insert shameless self-promotion here) While you're waiting for my fanfiction(s) to be updated, you can visit my tumblr where I post fanfiction. It's like a virtual catalogue/library where fanfiction is sorted (by genre, length, pairing, type, etc.). The link is tmifanfiction tumblr com but take away the spaces and replace them with periods.  
Until next time, Cali.

* * *

**Robert Sheehan:** actor playing Simon in the City Of Bones movie

**Jamie Campbell Bower:** actor playing Jace in City Of Bones movie

Admittedly, I haven't actually watched the COB movie, due to the fact that I can't imagine any of the actors/actresses as the characters they play.  
If I watch the movie, some part of me will always see (for example) Robert Sheehan's face as Simon, even if I'd originally imagined Simon as completely different. The book-version of Simon will forever be lost to me, floating somewhere in the void. Okay, I'll stop rambling now. Does anyone else think the same way?


End file.
